So what exactly is gentleness?

In the light of this spring's rather gloomy everyday life, and the daily news of war and injustice in the media, I've been wondering if humanity is heading for some kind of little hell. A hell where we all go, regardless of our deeds and misdemeanours. A place where we all end up because humanity is collectively disappearing into an egocentric bubble where the majority have forgotten the strength that lies in good deeds and gentleness.

Sometimes it's easy to believe that humanity is entering a critical phase. And sometimes we feel hope. Hope that goodness, gentleness, will prevail in the end. The hope that humanity can come together in a common direction, where it's all about being useful to society and being good neighbours.

So what exactly is gentleness? French philosopher and psychoanalyst Anne Dufourmantelle died in an accident while trying to save two children from drowning off the coast of Pampelonne beach, near St Tropez. She was only 53 years old, but lived to the full her daring philosophy of daring to live, embraced by risk. She published a series of philosophical books. One of the books that stands out is The Power of Gentleness. Meditations on the Risk of Living. A rather untraditional subject in philosophy.

In the introduction to her book, Dufourmantelle writes that gentleness is a mystery. Perhaps this is why many people find it difficult to recognise a gentle version of themselves. She goes on to say that a person, a stone, a thought, an attitude, a colour can all demonstrate gentleness. So can innocence, courage, wonder and vulnerability. An extract from the book reads as follows: "In the symbolic order, as in certain martial arts, gentleness can repel and defeat evil better than any other response. And perhaps that's what it will take to defeat evil in our time, gentleness in its pure and honest form.

Dufourmantelle is right when she writes that the word "gentleness" does not have the same value as joy, truth and security. For someone to feel seen, welcomed or included. And to recognise gentleness. When someone is gentle to you, the recipient recognises good feelings.

Trying to tune into looking outwards, seeing others and praising the work of others, whether on social media or in the moment - or giving heartfelt gentle applause to musicians on stage. Just to see others in their full perfection. Opening up to another in a state of gentleness. It's a bit like being at a concert. You open up to what you're about to hear, not to be gentle to yourself, but to the people on stage. And often, those who open up to the music are surprised by a stirring instrumental or vocal joy. Real joy.

Good mothers know what gentleness can do for a fragile child. Gentleness conveyed as empathy, love and care makes the child feel safe and cared for.

Another extract from Dufourmantelle's book reads as follows "Gentleness is first and foremost an intelligence, an intelligence that sustains life, saves it and promotes it". This is a good starting point for activating ourselves intellectually as gentle people - and collectively.

And feel free to disregard New Age cultur, which is spiritually about looking inwards and then selling it as a package deal. Look instead for a gentleness that speaks soul to soul. A gentle feeling that gives without expecting anything in return.

Simone Weil said: "But in my opinion there is no greatness except in gentleness.

We need to bring gentleness back. On a grand scale.